Cultivating Altruism: Humility, Practice, and Intentional Action

Key Quotes

"Many many details of the evening haunt me but the biggest one is that i think i would have died if it hadn't been for the actions of this stranger who made a split second decision to try to save my life many years ago as she was driving home late one night this happened i was crossing an overpass into the city a little dog a little orangish dog ran right out into the freeway in front of my car and i did i think what many people instinctively do which is swerve to try to avoid it and that sent my car into first a fishtail and then a spin across the lanes of freeway traffic miraculously not hitting anybody until my car came to rest in the fast lane of the freeway facing backward into the oncoming traffic and the engine died"

Abigail Marsh recounts a near-fatal car accident where a stranger's quick actions saved her life. This formative experience deeply impacted her, leading her to dedicate her career to understanding the motivations behind such selfless acts. Marsh highlights how a single, split-second decision by another person can have profound life-altering consequences.

"altruism is generally defined in psychology as a behavior that helps somebody and that was the intention of the behavior that you help somebody specifically because you wanted to help them not for some underlying reason like when you help someone pick up their groceries after their bag breaks in a parking lot or when you see a person struggling to open a door you know little acts of kindness and everyday gestures that you may not think twice about doing those are great keep it up but for abigail and her work as a researcher she's interested in the overachievers an altruistic person or an altruist is somebody who habitually does i would say more altruistic things than the average person"

Abigail Marsh clarifies the definition of altruism, distinguishing between everyday acts of kindness and the more profound, habitual altruism she studies. Marsh explains that her research focuses on individuals who consistently perform altruistic behaviors beyond what is considered average. This distinction sets the stage for understanding extreme altruists.

"one of the most interesting things about this research at the beginning was that they often thought that i probably wouldn't find anything because in their view there's absolutely nothing different about somebody who would donate a kidney to a stranger from anybody else this turned out to be an important clue that would later reveal the kernel of every altruist"

Abigail Marsh shares a surprising observation from her research on altruistic kidney donors: they often believed they were no different from anyone else. Marsh suggests that this very perception, the lack of self-importance, is a key characteristic that defines altruists. This insight points to humility as a foundational element of altruism.

"the main one of which and i know this will be a totally shocking statement is that they're all less selfish than other people and i think a lot of people assume that they just they're sort of all puffed up with moral virtue and it's like the opposite genuinely altruistic people are very humble and it turns out that humility and being unselfish go hand in hand because if you think that you're the most special person around why would you want to help less special people you know the special person should get all the stuff and the less special people should not and so truly altruistic people do not think of themselves as special"

Abigail Marsh states that a primary finding from her research is that altruistic individuals are less selfish. Marsh explains that this lack of selfishness is directly linked to humility, as those who do not consider themselves exceptionally special are more inclined to help others. Marsh argues that altruists do not view themselves as superior.

"abigail marsh a psychology and neuroscience professor at georgetown university says the easiest way to be more altruistic more giving whether it's of your time or money is just start start with something that seems easy for you that does seem intuitive whether that's just like picking up trash in your neighborhood or you know giving change to a stranger who asks for it or whatever um and for some people that's donating blood which is it is relatively easy but it's amazing how few people do it regularly"

Abigail Marsh advises that the simplest path to becoming more altruistic is to begin with small, intuitive actions. Marsh suggests starting with activities that feel easy and natural, such as picking up litter or giving change. Marsh notes that even relatively simple acts like donating blood are underutilized by many.

"abigail knows that most of us mean well but if you really want to follow through with your intentions make a plan and i will say there's the whole science of what's called implementation intentions so the idea is that if you want to do something that's consistent with your values the more precisely you can sort of plot out the where when why how the more likely you are to actually act in the way that you want to act in other words and stay with me here commit to the bit make the commitment"

Abigail Marsh emphasizes the importance of planning to translate good intentions into action, introducing the concept of "implementation intentions." Marsh explains that by precisely mapping out the specifics of when, where, and how an action will occur, individuals significantly increase their likelihood of following through. Marsh encourages a firm commitment to these plans.