Reframing Trauma Into Strength Fuels Opportunity and Personal Growth

Key Quotes

"You have dominant figures in your family right? Like your dad was a dominant figure, Bret Hart's a dominant figure, Owen was before he tragically passed away, and it's difficult when you have a dominant person in your family to stick your own head up in life. So a lot of people listen to this, maybe it's their dad, he's just a strong figure, or their mom was an imposing figure in their family, or you got a grandfather who everybody talks about in a family, and a lot of times I worry about this with my own kids sometimes, daddy, I've become a pretty well-known guy. Does it, does it cause my kids to play small in their life? You talk about this exact thing in the book. So can you speak to that? Was it difficult to poke your own head up and not, you say in the book, like the tendency was to want to be small and think small and play small in your life?"

Nattie Neidhart addresses the challenge of emerging from the shadow of dominant family figures. She explains how the immense legacies of her grandfather, uncles, and father created a tendency to "play small" in her own life, particularly as a woman in a male-dominated industry. This highlights the internal struggle of finding one's own identity and voice when surrounded by established greatness.

"So for me growing up, I was like, do I stay small to fit in or do I get big to stand out? And so that's one of the things I love so much about the book is that I, in writing the book, I was really able to explore that, like, almost do a deep dive into like what made me want to do this, what made me want to run hard with it, and what, like, how did I find my voice? Because for so, for so much of my youth and teenage years and my, you know, being an adult, like, especially navigating my way through WWE in this very, you know, very strong male-dominated world, I didn't feel like I had a voice."

Nattie Neidhart discusses her internal conflict between conforming to fit in and asserting herself to stand out. She explains that writing her book allowed her to deeply explore the origins of her drive and the process of discovering her own voice, especially within the challenging environment of professional wrestling. This quote emphasizes the personal journey of self-discovery and empowerment.

"And so what was really cool is that right outside that room, the window in that room of my mom's bedroom when she was a little girl, outside the window, you could see the wrestling ring. My grandfather had a wrestling ring on his lawn, he built it, designed it. And then he left the ring on his lawn during the summers because he, the kids and everybody, it was like it was our north star, it was our foundation, it was our anchor. So when I would look out the window, the first thing I would see was the ring, and I didn't quite know, like, I didn't know exactly why I was feeling the way that I was feeling, but I was drawn to that ring, like it felt like somewhere down there, something was going to save me."

Nattie Neidhart describes the symbolic importance of the wrestling ring visible from her childhood room during a period of family instability. She explains how this ring served as a "north star," a foundation, and an anchor, drawing her in with a sense of hope and salvation amidst hardship. This illustrates how a physical symbol can represent deep emotional and psychological anchors during difficult times.

"And so while my dad was falling apart and struggling and battling all sorts of demons, I realized from an early age that I had to create my own stability. So I got this job, and I love writing about my, my job, my first job was at a restaurant. I was a bus girl, I cleaned tables, I cleaned urinals, like clean bathrooms, I was a dishwasher. I loved that job because it was my first real taste of independence, like I could work hard and the harder I worked, the more security I had, so that nobody was going to take everything I had, you know."

Nattie Neidhart reflects on her early realization of the need for self-created stability due to her father's struggles. She highlights her first job as a bus girl as a pivotal experience, providing her with a tangible sense of independence and security earned through hard work. This demonstrates the development of a strong work ethic and self-reliance stemming from early life challenges.

"And so many people, it's like, when I wrote the book, I was like, that's where I really struggled because I was like, I'm sharing stuff that's so personal and so deep, especially about my dad, and I don't want to betray him by sharing these intimate times that, like, my dad broke my heart, or my dad was struggling with drugs, or my dad was struggling with substance abuse, or my dad was falling apart, or he kept losing his job. Like, I kept, I kept thinking, like, oh, I don't want to look like I'm exploiting my dad or exposing him, but I have to be able to share what we were going through because there's a great part on the other side of that. There's a lot of hope on the other side of that."

Nattie Neidhart expresses the personal conflict she experienced while writing about her father's struggles, balancing the desire for authenticity with the fear of betraying his memory. She explains her decision to share these intimate details, recognizing that doing so was necessary to convey the hope and healing that can be found on the other side of difficult experiences. This underscores the courage required to be vulnerable for the sake of a greater message.

"And so I want people to read the book and look at themselves and go, why not me? Like, why can't I open a restaurant? And you know, be a, like, whatever dreams you have, why not you?"

Nattie Neidhart shares the profound question that emerged from her journey: "Why not me?" She encourages readers to internalize this question, applying it to their own aspirations and dreams, regardless of their background or perceived limitations. This quote serves as a powerful call to action for self-belief and the pursuit of personal goals.

"And so now I look at that, I look at me, and I look at how it was growing up, and I'm like, I'm so grateful for all those experiences because it truly made me stronger. It made me appreciate everything so much more. It made me appreciate my family, it made me appreciate my, my, my life. It made me appreciate all the things that I have now. Like, everything I have now, I don't take for granted because I know what it's like to struggle and I know what it's like to not have a lot."

Nattie Neidhart reflects on her past struggles, expressing gratitude for how those experiences forged her strength and deepened her