Reframing Success Through Intentional Connection and Shared Rituals

Key Quotes

"I know they're expensive but I just can't have any other pencils. I'm the exact same way. All right, we've established that we're both nerds around writing and writing implements and things like that."

The speaker, Samin Nosrat, and the interviewer, Jonathan Fields, find common ground in their appreciation for Blackwing pencils. This shared detail highlights a mutual understanding of the value placed on specific tools for creative and thoughtful work, suggesting a deeper connection beyond the immediate topic of discussion.

"And then at some point, probably either I think toward the end, she starts playing this song, 'Untouchable Face,' and I'm sort of, I don't know the words, so I'm just sort of like trying to pay attention and everyone starts singing along and there's a point where she says, 'Fuck you,' and you're an untouchable face."

Nosrat recounts a pivotal moment at an Ani DiFranco concert that marked a significant emotional and personal awakening. The raw, transgressive lyric, juxtaposed with her upbringing as a "goodie two shoes" following rules, represents a breakthrough in expressing anger and asserting her own identity against familial expectations.

"I made a book, I made this thing, and I put it out in the world, and I always was pretty clear once I put it out in the world, it wasn't mine anymore. And in some ways, I now feel very distant from it."

Nosrat reflects on the phenomenon of her book, Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat, and its subsequent adaptation. She expresses a sense of detachment from the work once it was released, indicating a personal boundary between her identity and the public's perception of her as a symbol of the book's success.

"I realized I'm not in a place to say yes or no to anything, so I'm just putting a hold on any decision-making until I have quiet time to figure out what makes any sense to do. I know if I don't decide to do something because I care about it in my heart, I will be miserable."

Nosrat describes a period of overwhelm following the success of her book and television series, necessitating a pause in decision-making. This quote emphasizes her commitment to making choices aligned with her inner feelings to avoid future regret and maintain personal integrity amidst external pressures.

"And so there was a way where like I confused for very long time the like being at the party with being like genuinely like rooted in relationship with people. Do you know what I mean? Like, and it was not like ill-spirited or out of manipulation. It was like a desperate, like baby part of me trying to belong."

Nosrat articulates a past confusion between social inclusion and genuine connection. She explains that her desire to "belong" led her to seek invitations and participation, mistaking the outward appearance of being "at the party" for the deeper fulfillment of being truly rooted in relationships.

"And so there was a way where like I confused for very long time the like being at the party with being like genuinely like rooted in relationship with people. Do you know what I mean? Like, and it was not like ill-spirited or out of manipulation. It was like a desperate, like baby part of me trying to belong."

Nosrat articulates a past confusion between social inclusion and genuine connection. She explains that her desire to "belong" led her to seek invitations and participation, mistaking the outward appearance of being "at the party" for the deeper fulfillment of being truly rooted in relationships.

"And so I kept thinking about that. I was like, oh, like that's kind of the sentiment that I wrote Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat was like, here, take this. And in a weird way, I was like, oh, that's what how I can think of a recipe is like, here, take this. It's like I'm giving this to you, and when I give you something, it's no longer mine anymore. It's yours to do with as you wish."

Nosrat redefines her relationship with recipes by exploring the etymology of the word. She connects the act of giving a recipe to the act of giving a gift, signifying that once shared, the recipe is no longer hers to control but belongs to the recipient to adapt and use as they see fit.

"And I really in some ways have majorly shifted certain things and now I like do say yes and I do go on the trip and I do take the opportunity in a way that like historically I've just self-flagellated and put my head down and worked."

Nosrat describes a significant personal shift in her approach to life and opportunities. Influenced by witnessing her father's death, she now prioritizes embracing experiences and saying "yes" to opportunities, moving away from a past pattern of relentless work and self-denial.