Reclaim Personal Time With Family DIY Days
TL;DR
- Designating a "DIY day" allows individuals to reclaim personal time, preventing burnout and fostering independent interests by relinquishing the "cruise director" role often assumed in family dynamics.
- Implementing DIY days enables family members with disparate interests to pursue individual activities simultaneously, such as one person engaging with holiday lights while another works in a garage.
- A DIY day can be scaled to DIY hours, offering a structured yet flexible approach to personal time management within a family unit, even with young children.
- This strategy directly addresses the common issue of individuals, particularly women, feeling a lack of personal time due to the assumption that weekends must be entirely dedicated to family coordination.
- By allowing each family member autonomy over their own fun, DIY days can reduce the pressure of constant activity planning and the perceived obligation to spend every weekend in lockstep.
Deep Dive
The core insight is that personal fulfillment, even on weekends, can be achieved by embracing "DIY days"--periods where individuals pursue their own interests independently. This approach challenges the assumption that all leisure time must be spent in lockstep with family, offering a structured way to reclaim personal agency and cater to diverse interests within a household.
The primary implication of implementing DIY days is the creation of dedicated time for individual pursuits, which can significantly enhance personal well-being and reduce the burden of constant family coordination. For individuals, particularly those who often feel responsible for organizing family activities, relinquishing "cruise director" duties allows for rejuvenation and engagement in personal hobbies or relaxation. This can prevent burnout and foster a greater sense of autonomy. For families with older children or no children, it provides a practical framework for respecting differing interests; one family member might pursue an outdoor activity while another engages in a creative project. While screen time for children is a potential concern, the podcast suggests that parents can either maintain existing limits or permit it if other forms of activity have been met during the week, framing it as a trade-off for adult personal time. The model is adaptable, with "DIY hours" serving as a scaled-down alternative for families with younger children. Furthermore, the concept can be integrated with shared moments, such as planned communal meals, to balance individual autonomy with family connection. Ultimately, this strategy allows individuals to carve out necessary personal time without requiring a complete abandonment of togetherness, promoting a more balanced and fulfilling use of leisure time for all household members.
Action Items
- Draft household agreement: Define "DIY day" parameters for families with older children or no kids, specifying individual responsibility for fun and potential shared meal times.
- Implement "DIY hours": Designate specific hours for independent activities within a weekend day, providing structure for families where full-day DIY is not feasible.
- Evaluate family interest alignment: For 3-5 family units, assess the degree of differing interests to determine the suitability and potential benefits of implementing DIY days.
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View Episode Notes →Key Quotes
"If you are feeling like you need some downtime or independent fun, identify a day when everyone in your household will do their own thing. And you can officially relinquish all cruise director duties."
Laura explains that a "DIY day" involves designating a specific day where each household member pursues their own activities independently. This approach allows individuals to reclaim personal time and relinquish the responsibility of constantly organizing or directing family activities.
"Don't assume that you and your family have to spend the weekend in lockstep. You might officially designate one weekend day as a DIY day. That is, a do it yourself day. Everyone does their own thing."
Laura suggests that families do not need to be engaged in identical activities throughout the weekend. She proposes setting aside a specific day, termed a "DIY day," where each person is free to pursue their individual interests and activities.
"DIY days are great for families where people have different interests from each other. Mom can go see the holiday lights. And Dad can spend all day out in the garage if that is what he likes. One kid can read and another can find some friends to play a game all day."
Laura highlights that "DIY days" are particularly beneficial for families with diverse interests among members. She provides examples of how different family members can simultaneously engage in their preferred activities, such as one person enjoying holiday lights while another works in the garage, or children pursuing separate hobbies.
"The key thing here is that I know many people, and particularly women, don't feel they have time for themselves. But I think that is often because there is this assumption that weekends need to be spent with family and organizing everything for everybody."
Laura identifies a common issue where individuals, especially women, feel a lack of personal time due to the societal expectation that weekends must be dedicated to family activities and constant organization. She posits that this assumption contributes to the feeling of not having enough time for oneself.
"Planning a DIY day is a way to create space to do what you want and allow others time for what they want. You aren't the cruise director. And you don't have to coordinate activities all weekend long. Everybody just does their own thing."
Laura proposes that implementing a "DIY day" is a practical strategy for carving out personal time while also enabling others to pursue their own desires. She emphasizes that this approach liberates individuals from the role of constantly managing and coordinating family schedules, allowing everyone the freedom to engage in their preferred activities.
Resources
External Resources
Organizations & Institutions
- National University (NU) - Offers flexible online formats, four and eight-week courses, and monthly class starts for degrees and credentials.
- iHeart Radio - Producer of the Before Breakfast podcast.
Websites & Online Resources
- NU.edu - Website to learn more about National University's offerings.
- omnystudio.com/listener - Website for privacy information.
- airdoctorpro.com - Website for the Air Doctor air purifier.
Podcasts & Audio
- Before Breakfast - Podcast featuring daily tips on making the most of one's time.
Other Resources
- DIY day - Concept of a day where each household member pursues their own activities independently.